Life..... a Short Story.

Tomorrow i am gonna have the 1st exam of my 7th semester of b.tech. But not feeling like studying. Thought to play with keyboard and typing.... and some of thoughts prevailing my mind now... life, complexity... and relations again the trio that makes me crazy always.... may be you too. but just can't escape. Childhood was more easier... because the way of thinking was simpler, with time, innocence is gone(?), patience is disturbed and i am lost somewhere in a series of questions....... more drawn to past, mistakes and the great unanswered question "WHY I DID THIS?" and missing the magic of present and ruining my future too... can't get rid of this? how? confession? but to whom? to myself? OK, it works partially, but not totally....... TO WHOM IT CONCERNS, after spending 22 years of my life, all i have come to know about myself is i am a kinda complicated person, i admit, but not too bad, often i fail to make people understood what i think and want and often it leads ...

“ When I got enough confidence, The stage was gone. When I was sure of losing, I won. When I needed people the most, They left me. When I learnt to dry my tears, I found a shoulder to cry on. When I mastered the skill of hating, Somebody started loving me .” It took some years from my life to understand that this is life and I lived it, I m living it & I’ll. So what’s the point to keep complaining about what I have not got? So trying to make my life as my masterpiece by all I have. One advice from some wise person was,” You can win life by all means. If you simply avoid two things, “Comparing” & “Expectation”… ” Yeah it works. Though I am not claiming that am someone who doesn’t expect anything from life or compare. That is not possible 100%. But you know what; it’s like minimizing the expectations and maximizing the happiness. Another important thing is “ Patience ”, I didn’t have this. ...

ENOUGH!!!!!!!! Yes, it was high time to say just this word to all the damn problems . Suddenly I realized that I was wasting all my time, brain, potential for some damn and silly causes.... which pretends as if they are something bigger, they are controlling my life....huuuuuuuuh.. Just some bloody bullshit and I was a perfect emotional fool ... I was vulnerable because I was wasting all my emotions and bla bla… on a wrong place (sometime person)... I have struggled with my hair a lot... I have bitten my nails a lot... I have explained and sometime tried to make out people my points.... but nobody is 1. Ready to hear. 2. Ready to stop pretension. 3. Ready to stop their "valuable suggestions without any price [??][Whatever] “ to other without getting the whole matter. 4. Ready to “ OIL their own MACHINE " . But they are always ready to... 1. Hold your hand tightly saying "you are my TRUE FRIEND [??]... And then opens up their knapsack to deliver you all the knowledge t...

After a long time suddenly I felt like writing something about a year, full of drama, surprises, love, faith, friendship, betrayal…….. A rare cocktai l. 2009, the starting of the year was not so happening, somehow I assumed that this year is going to be a dull boring another year of my life. But the God chuckled in heaven saying,” oh!! Really!!! “ It was January or February; it was a reunion with my school pals on the occasion of saraswati puja . At college it was fest+ masti .Like every day after a heavy session of adda, masti and bla bla…… suddenly we discovered we are going to make a documentary for NSS ASHA ….. The topic was social issues. First we were just roaming about from this to that nothing was fit and perfect sometimes script was ready but none was there to act and lots of problems... but we four , DD, me, Aninya,Annesha … overcame all those.Don’t know how exactly. We got a group, named, “ SQUARE ROUTE ”, from one of my friend. At last we choose the topic ‘ female ...

This night at home......and the prevailing silence around......make me nostalgic,it makes the road open in front of me to my childhood......the days when world around me was my heaven.....the days together with my joint and giant family.......ice creams at evening, n "Mourilogence"....sometimes i was in a crowd or sometime very alone,starring at the road,seen from "Chatal".....the "Aam gachh", our "maath" s.....the introduction with my first private tutor.....i acted like a monkey and she was fritghtened that i migth be fallen........ but you know, i am .... i did that very well. Then first day at my school.....i was surprised that why all children are crying and that thing took my cry away.... i liked the days at school very much, BIHAN PATHSHALA, a nursery school and i was there by maintaning the "Parampara" of my family. The teachers, i still wonder how i was so popular that still they can remember me in any meeting !!!!!!! my first...

Again back from college for Saraswati puja....let it be anything but most importantly these are holidays....dont know how it will be...but may be it will be a memorable one.Anyways feeling tired today due to train journey from durgapur to home, good night.Lets rock